Category: Notes & Miscellany

September 14, 2014 /

A couple days ago somebody looked at my post about John Cena and Paul Heyman after having performed the following Google search: “will pual hymen bring john cena thug in 2014” A drunk and possibly high wrestling fan was contemplating the John Cena problem and Google offered me as relevant source material. I’m not being silly when I say this: I couldn’t be more proud. This is exactly why I write the things I do.…

August 6, 2014 /

 On Gods and Men   Randy Orton now like a John Hughes princely bad boy thug Tybalt in Roman Reigns face, never again, boy, Never again! He growls, with those godlike tattoos, more a fiery, arrogant deity, the kind that thunders down his wrath, Thor or maybe Zeus, slamming forth a hurricane on the old world warrior hero, dark handsome chivalrous police state thug gone rogue, resolved now like a knight to stand for truth…

June 29, 2014 /

There’s something wonderful about Sandow dressed as Abraham Lincoln losing to Big E. Very postmodern. Such a complex irony to unravel. Quoth Lana: “You foolish American.  Don’t you know that pride cometh before the fall?” She speaks hard-luck wisdom to us in the guise of a mean girl heel. Really, she’s offering tough post-Soviet love. I gush: Roman Reigns, entering not from the stage, but through the audience. And Dean Ambrose, too, and the Shield…

June 15, 2014 /

I can’t believe how quickly Bray Wyatt and his goons have grown stale!  Suddenly I’m not interested, they’re all flash and little substance.  They built up such epic promise but were ultimately unable to deliver.  I couldn’t get into Bray Wyatt’s soliloquy at all — his thing about a house on a hill with a white picket fence (or whatever it was) was tedious and difficult to follow.  It turns out John Cena was right:…

June 1, 2014 /

Oh, my dear blog.  Life got away from me these past few weeks.  I’ve been watching wrestling and taking notes, but the focused time to craft my posts has been hard to find, and my mind has been a thousand places.  There are so many things to say — about Lana the post-modern nationalist heel, about Stephanie, the most brilliant McMahon yet, about my thug heartthrob Dean Ambrose — and wrestling keeps charging ahead as…

May 15, 2014 /

I didn’t mean to let my beloved lit-smark blog go dormant the past couple weeks. I’ve just had my mind blown by Lana and her flashing of Vladimir Putin’s big head across the jumbotron, and her talking about Edward Snowden and sanctions. Lana as a WWE nationalist heel is a Soviet era cartoon stereotype, a throwback to the era of wrestling that coincided with the cold war. A petite bombshell in a power suit with…

April 22, 2014 /

I once heard a piece of internet folklore from some chick in a random internet forum, not wrestling related, could it have even that feminist message board I used to haunt? Anyway, she swore this was true. Once her dad went into a Denny’s to eat. He’s on the road, traveling, it’s that kind of Denny’s. And he’s got with him to read of all things Gravity’s Rainbow. And who just happens to be sitting…

April 19, 2014 /

“Over” is interesting.  “Over” is what happens when you finally get there.  You’re over when you succeed, when you’ve won the support of the crowd.  Triple H, who my smark friends think is killing wrestling, has actually worked “over” into his gimmick.  He’s called “The Game”, and his entrance video says “Game Over”, inverting that phrase into a new definition, away from its video game, Aliens 2 meaning of “Game over, man!  Game over!”  As…