On Erick Rowan’s Unbelievability of Character

Look, I like Erick Rowan just fine. His face turn was alright by me. But the overwrought story forced on him undermines the character he naturally seems to be. The Wyatt Family had a certain authenticity about it, and within that world he was a mute weirdo. I could buy him as a sort of autistic genius specializing in chess, Rubik’s Cubes, bomb building, that sort of thing. But really, it took him a little while to solve that Rubik’s Cube. A crazy genius can figure out the pattern and do a Rubik’s Cube pretty quick. And, there was nothing in those montages of watered-down crazy-ass backwoods cinema cliches to suggest that he was growing his own little vineyard out back and crafting award-winning artisanal wines. Would Bray Wyatt really tolerate him spending all his time tending his grapes? Or playing classical guitar — I mean, to the degree that the Wyatt Family have been southern cultural stereotypes, shouldn’t he be a fiddle or banjo player? And also, his IQ is 143 and we’re supposed to be all like, woah! But that’s right around my IQ. Sure, I used to keep bees and I make my own kombucha, but my point is it’s not THAT high an IQ. IQ’s can get way up there, like 180, 190. Those are the socially-awkward people who wear sheep’s masks and that sort of thing. Us cats down in the 140’s mostly just have a bunch of hobbies. So what is it, is Erick Rowan a savant with limited social skills, or is he just a smart guy who dabbles in a few things?

See what I mean? The whole thing’s a farce, it just doesn’t add up. They did not earn the story they are trying to sell for Erick Rowan. It has no groundwork laid for it. Erick Rowan wrote his own story, in which he is not a classical guitarist and vintner. The organic story that should probably be told is being overwritten by nonsense. I think they were trying to distinguish him from Luke Harper because Harper is a marvelous heel, so creepy ladies on Twitter think he’s way sexy (including me). They had to try to make Erick Rowan surprising, but they didn’t know how to match Harper’s authenticity in a babyface, because Harper is great based on the talent of the wrestler. His gimmick works because HE sells it. He sold the creepy greasy backwoods guy in a dirty wife beater better than Rowan sold that dude’s ZZ Top beard work jumpsuit-wearing counterpart. When they split, one of them had to go a different direction, and they had laid the course for a Rowan face turn so sloppily that we wound up with a Rowan who doesn’t make sense. And it’s too bad. The Erick Rowan character is like Bray Wyatt, sabotaged by the heavy-handed Wyatt Family storyline.

By the way, I am TOTALLY going to write about Neville vs. Zayn! But I had to get this off my chest first. Also might need to write about Sexy Star vs. Ivelisse, holy shit! Catching up on Lucha Underground as well.

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